I’ve been diagnosed with Commitment-Phobia. I resent the diagnosis that has been given to me by my sour female ex-gfs / ex-acquaintances / ex-sexual partners / ex-whatDOyouMEANweWERENOTmoreTHANjustFRIENDS?.
I love my life. I have a beautiful little boy, I enjoy the work I do, I keep busy. But, no matter how I explain to a woman my desire to not want to take things too seriously or that I am not interested in a strong commitment, I always end up being the bad guy. I have to deal with their passive aggressive crap like, “That’s fine, I understand you don’t want anything serious.” Then comes the inevitable, “WHO THE HELL IS THAT HO ON YOUR FACEBOOK!?”
I have always been strictly monogamous. I do not have the time, energy, or desire to be a playa. Plus, I am simply not smooth. But, my lady-friends always seem to end up becoming jealous or going down the not-getting-enough of my time route.
Am I simply attracting the wrong women or am I not communicating strongly enough my position? Is it possible that my expectations are simply not realistic?
No matter how times we women are told that changing a man is impossible, most of us have this ginormous little bitty teeny weeny belief that yes, oh yes, we can change him—even if it’s just one thing.
Because you insist you’re not interested in a relationship, you’ve turned yourself into the man we MUST have a relationship with. We want to be the one woman who can pull you in and make you fall so deeply in love that you could never be interested in another. It’s like a competition with all of your other ”ex-gfs/ex-acquaintances/ex-sexual partners /ex-whatDOyouMEANweWERENOTmoreTHANjustFRIENDS?” friends.
Sure, in the beginning, a woman might honestly think she’ll be okay as your side piece, but it’s unrealistic for you to believe that a relationship like that will last longer than a few weeks. Who am I kidding? I’d give it a few days. She’d never say this out loud, but somewhere in her head, in her cell phone, in her car late at night parked in front of your house, she’s thinking this: “You don’t want me? Bullsh*t you don’t want me. I’m going to make you want me. You just watch how crazy I can become!”
Now, if she does stick around for as long as you’d like her to, and she doesn’t seem to have any qualms about it, I say, “RUN.” Preferably to the nearest clinic. This probably ain’t her first rodeo.
It is what it is. Women are usually in it for all or nothing. They’re going to play your game because they’re playing a game of their own. And you’re the prize. You’re the cute little rabbit in a Greyhound race that no animal gets to sink their teeth into.